
We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soda pop with sugar in it, but we weren’t overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.
We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn’t had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!!
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
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Melt Down
You’ve bitten into a hot pepper. Your mouth is on fire. Your eyes are streaming. Don’t reach for water! It will act like a blowtorch. A bite of banana, bread or milk is what you want. It will dampen the flames.
Question: Why did the man in the orange juice factory lose his job?
Answer: He couldnt concentrate
Question: What do you use to mend a jack-o-lantern with?
Answer: Why, of course, a pumpkin patch
Question: Why did the radish kiss the banana?
Answer: Because the banana had a peel
Question: What do you call a knife that can slice through four loaves of bread?
Answer: A four loaf cleaver
Question: What do canoes and small children have in common?
Answer: They both work better when paddled from behind
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A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS.
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Sign on a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
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Sign on packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body.
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Military Life Then & Now
Then - Mail took weeks to come to the ship.
Now - Every time you get near land, there’s a mob topside to see if their cell phone works.
Then - Canteens were made out of steel and you could heat coffee or hot chocolate in them.
Now - Canteens are made of plastic. You cant heat them because they’ll melt, and anything inside always tastes like plastic.
Then - We called the enemy things like Commie Bastards and Reds because we didn’t like them.
Now - We call the enemy things like Opposing Forces and Aggressors so we wont offend them.
Then - We declared victory when the enemy was dead and all his things were broken.
Now - We declare victory when the enemy says he is sorry and won’t do it again.
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U S Legacies Magazine October 2005
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